Dying to Self

Christ made this pronouncement to all who sought to follow him:

"If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me. For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it. For what will it profit a man if he gains the whole world and forfeits his soul? Or what shall a man give in return for his soul? (Matthew 16:24-26)

Over the course of my meagre years, trudging through this narrow road that leads to life, I have wrestled daily with what this call means. Jesus with great effect made it clear that any who desires to follow Him must be willing to surrender the entirety of their life to Him. To pick up our metaphorical cross which is to fix our gaze on Him, as we, with faith, love and reverence acknowledge him as Lord of every part of our lives.

For me, this has meant regularly laying before Jesus my ambitions, dreams and every ounce of self, asking Him to shape them for His divine purposes as opposed to my earth-bound conceptions.

The Cost of the Call

Stated simply, following Christ means willingly surrendering ownership of our lives and saying, "Lord not my will, but yours, be done" (Mark 14:36). Such surrender often entails us denying our natural inclinations. Yet although self-denial is a common facet of most religions, Christian self-denial is fundamentally different. What is truly compelling about being Christian, is how our surrender stems from love and grateful devotion as opposed to religious obligation. Often in fact, you will find Christians “rejoicing in their sufferings” (Romans 5:3).

When Jesus spoke of the cross, He deliberately evoked an image that would have unsettled the first listeners. They would have understood that an individual carrying their cross would be journeying to their death.

Knowing what Christ requires of those who follow Him, it is no wonder the gospel message has always been, as Paul describes it, a “stumbling block” to many (1 Corinthians 1:23).

The Struggle to Die to Self and Live for Christ

I know this struggle intimately.

As a child, frequently hearing the gospel, I sensed Christ calling me to follow Him. There was a simplicity to my faith then, my reasoning was as simple as if Christ was indeed God, then surely, I choose to go wherever He leads.

Yet the passing years have made me understand that the decision to follow Christ is not made once only, but daily.

There have been seasons which felt like perpetual valleys, where my soul grew weary beleaguered with melancholy. During those times, I have been left with difficult questions. Is this life I chose of continual surrender truly worth it? Should I really be giving up my whole life to a calling that so often requires me to choose a path completely different from everyone around me?

Those thoughts were born not merely from a wavering faith but from the painful reality that dying to self never ends. It is a slow continual surrender.

The greatest sacrifices are not always outwardly noticeable. They are commonly quiet resolutions that leave small wounds on your heart.

Throughout school and university, I frequently felt like a recluse. Sacrificing the casual relationships, heavy drinking and partying that the culture around me deemed essential milestones.

But many of those experiences are breeding grounds for lifestyles and desires that will ultimately pull us away from God.

One of the sacrifices that has left a mark on me concerns my love for fitness and bodybuilding. All my training is confined to my home and local park because I am aware of my weaknesses. Honouring God by living purely has meant willingly avoiding environments that repeatedly provoke trails of temptation. This has been one expression of surrender.

Perhaps one of the greatest sacrifices Christ asks of His followers is with our relationship with money.

Jesus warned us that some who received the gospel with joy, could have the truth choked out of them by worries of life and deceitfulness of riches (Mark 4:19). No one can serve two masters, for they would love one and hate the other (Matthew 6:24). The love of wealth and the comfort it promises will always seek to replace Christ as our Lord.

God Sustains Us Through It

In my life it has so often seemed that fixing my eyes on Jesus has led me away from the worldly comfort I naturally I longed for. Yet in those moments I have known the deepest comfort, because I have entrusted my life to a God who is beyond worthy of it all trust, worship and praise (Revelations 4:11).

Trusting Christ, and choosing again and again to place my faith in Him, is the only way I have known to persevere. Faith is our confidence in what we cannot yet see, based on the character of God not our circumstances (Hebrews 11:1).

But this faith I have come to realise was meant to be fanned into a flame daily. God never intended for us to live independently of Him, but to depend upon His grace each day.

It has been whilst treading valleys that I have learnt the importance of praying for my daily bread. Yesterday’s grace cannot and was not mean to sustain today’s burden. Each day brings need for God’s strength, mercery and presence (Matthew 6:11, John 6:35).

God did not intend for us to carry the cross alone. Jesus reminds us:

“Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:29-30)

We need Christ in His fullness, His spirt, word and church. Though dying to self feels like a lonesome journey, we were never meant to walk it alone. If we tried to walk it alone, we would be crushed underneath the burden we were not designed to bear.

A Life in Christ

Writing to the church in Philippi, Paul declared,

“For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain” (Philippians 1:20-21).

Those profound words capture the essence of belonging to Christ. Regardless of any hardships we face, or doubts we battle, we can be assured of the truth that we truly have been crucified with Him. Every valley will have its end, because Christ came not to deprive us of life, but give to us in abundance.

Our confidence as Christians is not in our strength but Christ’s in us (Galatians 2:20).

In His perfect timing, we will reap the reward God has promised. And all our momentary afflictions will pass, because the one who dwells within us has already overcome the world.

“And he died for all, that those who live might no longer live for themselves but for him who for their sake died and was raised” (2 Corinthians 5:15).

The Eternal Prize

In Christ, we discover our truest life, fullest joy, and lasting contentment. Whilst we continue to struggle with the temptation to seek worldly comfort, what we have received in Him is of infinite and eternal worth and glory.

Dying to self still remains a daily struggle for me, yet I am continually reminded that Christ asks us to surrender compares to what He has already given us. Every act of surrender and obedience is a beautiful display of our love to the One who has loved us enough to give up His life for us.

One day our faith will be finished in the sight of Christ’s completed work on Earth. All our struggle with sin and suffering will end. He will wipe away every tear we shed and heal every wound we endured for Him (Revelations 21:4). We will know with certainty nothing we surrendered was actually truly lost.